In Honor Of Valentine’s Day

What are some of the worst pick-up lines you’ve ever heard?  Or said?  I started thinking about this the other day.  Being a chick, I don’t really get why guys can’t just talk to someone like normal human beings.  But these pick-up lines are good for a laugh.

  • You must be from Tennessee.  Because  you’re the only ten I see.  Being originally from Tennessee, this one cracks me up.
  • If you were a fruit, you’d be a FINEapple.  There are permutations of this one like flower/DAMNdelion.
  • Is your name Sunny?  Because you’re hot.  Pretty sure I saw this one on a t-shirt someplace.
  • Are those space pants?  Because your ass is out of this world.  I heard Kanye used this one.
  • If I was a fly I’d land on you.  Because you’re the shit.  Could anyone seriously think this one would work?
  • Does this smell like chloroform?  Truthfully, this one is just creepy, but it made me giggle.  So what does that say about me?

I talked to Mr. R. about this topic.  He’s my go-to guy for all things dude.  He enlightened me with his personal favorite: I’m the only one in here who thinks you’re pretty, so I’m the best you can do.  Don’t get mad at me.  I’m the one who thinks you’re pretty.  Um, yeah.  Good luck with that one.

As we gear up for Valentine’s Day, if you’re out there looking for your ‘happily ever after’ maybe consider just being yourself?  You couldn’t do any worse than with some of these clunkers.